Reality or illusion,which is more worth it??

ok,,,

2009-07-15T09:57:00.000-07:00

erhum..tml got math test,argh!!!,i now cant remember anything at all...T_T

Somehow,for better for worse.I felt that the friends I made me felt something never before.
I didn't had this feeling back then.But I can definitely get used to it,its a warmth feeling that is similar to family warmth.A warmth that I have never felt before,not even from my family members.I guess to me,they are even closer then them.Thank you,thank you and thank you.Thank you all for who you are,I won't trade a single moment with you guys.For any riches in the world or thousand wishes granted.

CUi la

2009-07-11T21:37:00.000-07:00

HAHA,just reach home from sentosa outing with OB people.It was great.Never have I once not enjoyed myself when going out with them.But then,maybe because the previous day is the physical test thats why body feel very cui??.I cannot even spam sugar to keep it going :P ,but later i gotta go,sobsob.earlier then them.walk a little bit with weilson then he tell me i walk wrong direction,I am such a idiot.When I reach home,I bath right away and immeditaely crash in bed.Dont even need time to go into sleep.Must have been very tired.Alright,thats all

OH YEA!

2009-07-09T06:14:00.001-07:00

OH YEA,I GOT MY WALLET BACK,THX TO KENNETH!!.Tyco kia sia me.tml is the physical test,i dont think i can do it sia.sob sob.haha,but i guess i still must try my best

The strings of fate are made in such a way that,all the pieces fall in line with one another.Fitting exactly like a jigsaw puzzle

fuck

2009-07-08T08:36:00.001-07:00

I guess the only thing interesting is..,i lost my wallet,everything is gone.I lost alot more things then said.Hopefully i can get back again what i have lost.Dear god,if you truly loved me,please let a kind soul return me my wallet.

After a accident.
A man will have many thoughts
one of the few is what he want to have
I lost recovered lost emotions
deadly aggressions
Ultimate confidence
and broken feelings

Star-crossed loving

2009-07-06T04:12:00.000-07:00

Hi pepz,i decide to write a story instead of posting my life..,i will only post if got something interesting,in replace will be a poem or story :>,btw i am not a good story writer,only have a good imagination

this story have no relation to any other story,thought the picture and title is taken from legend of mana,credits to them,something i thought of in my free time while listening to some songs :>

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.:Star Crossed Lovers:.

Somewhere in this world,lived a boy who had everything in his life.Be it money,food or clothes he had them all.However,he is missing the most important thing in life and that is to love.He obeyed his parents because they are simply his parents,he listened to his relatives for he thought that is the most normal thing to do.Ever since young,he is taught to be well-mannered and every single way to be a gentleman.Many have thought that he had a kind-heart and a soul with no equal in purity.However,if only they knew that he only behaved in a way he is taught and trained to be.

It was not long after the boy started to taste bitterness,to bask in anger and letting his rage seethe.He did not dare to present these emotions to his family nor his friends.However when night falls,he wander out into the streets and cause destruction.This continued for many years,until the boy was put down and sent for discipline.He is not cruel or violent by nature,but his reasons are thought to be weird by others.He told the councilors "I want to fill the emptiness I felt in my heart.When i raise my fist against others,I felt ease inside".The councilors are shocked and surprised,of how this boy truly felt.His household was called.However,thank the stars that only his maid who have raised him since birth is around.She answered the phone and through her tears,she agreed to help the councilors teach the boy about values of life.

The boy was able to understand.Within two weeks,he understood kindness,compassion and empathy.He no longer live to fight,instead he channel the way to fill the void in his heart.He started to lust after materialistic gains.It was not as effective but it definitely worked.He displayed unequaled compassion to all,and his parents felt that something in their son have changed for the better.They set their mind at ease,though he is incomplete,at least he will slowly understand.

Many years past,the boy lived a good life.He relied on himself for everything he needed.He understood brother loyalty,friendship and many other good traits.Many girls had past by in his life,however none of them are able to fill that final missing puzzle piece in his heart.His parents thought it will be impossible for him,for he does not love.Soon,he entered the next phase of his life.He is only a young adult,however his face seems to be seasoned with burden.His friends told him "your eyes masked a emptiness beneath that sad glow".Though he understands,he cant change for he does not know its origin.

One day,during a small gathering.The boy walked with his friends along side him,he wanted to know everyone around.It was not long until he met a girl.As if on instinct,the boy displayed unparalleled kindness and gentleness.However deep inside,he was disgusted by the girl for no rhyme or reason.The boy was afraid.He was afraid he would be succumb towards his dark ego.He quickly shook aside all thoughts and pretended nothing had happened.

As if fate would not allow him to recover,he met the girl not once,not twice but every single turn he make would bring her to his sight.He moans in despair and refuse to let any negative emotions fill him.Over time,he tried his best to interact with the girl.Slowly,he start to like her more.Through her speech and actions,he slowly learn the girl is kind and true to all.Not one ounce of her was deceit.He asked from advice from his close friends.To him,the feeling was new.His friends laughed at his foolishness "perhaps love?" they replied.

The boy was surprised.For the first time in his life,he felt love.None of the other woman he been with made him felt this way.He could definitely get use to this feeling he thought silently.Throwing away his reasoning and consciousness of how he acted,he decide to know the girl even more.They went out,they played and spent most of their time together.Everyone could see they had become the best of friends.One night,after a day of fun.The girl caught sight of the boy's eyes and said "your eyes look very sad",the boy look to the sky and smiled in silent.

Some time passed and the boy decided to stop holding back.Every moment that pass without her is choking him.Every second without her presence made him felt afraid.He decide to confess his love.However,fate was not so kind as to let him off this easily.The girl rejected him.In this moment,the boy felt the same anger in him years ago.However it was heavier and it weigh even his body down.His heart wept.He carried his legs and ran away.Unable to bear the pain within his body any longer,he cried.His tears flowed without end and was soon consumed by the heavens that cried along with him.He wished he never knew love,for it took him to great heights and plummet him to the ground.After that time,the girl no longer heard from the boy.He is around still,but had already forgotten about him.They lived separate lives that would soon have its fates intertwined once more.

The seasons came and gone by.The boy was still lost,sad and broken.He dared not unlock his heart any more to anyone and he pushed away all who tried to pry it open.The girl was living her life,healthy and well.She had a boyfriend and was filled with happiness.Everyday she lives well,the boy would suffer.Like a trade of happiness and sadness with god as the banker.

A day came,with the sun glaring down upon the land.As if to signify the beginning of a tragedy.True enough,the girl could no longer see.Her sight have been robbed away by an accident.A car crash and her eyes stabbed by a glass.Alas,her luck decreed both eyes shall be blind.Her boyfriend refused to waste his time around a girl who is dependent on others for the rest of her life,he left her.Just as how the boy once suffered,she now felt similar pain as the boy did.However this time,the sky did not cry along with her.

A few days passed,the girl had a caretaker.She knew it was a man,however she could not recognize it.But she know some time ago,someone gave her the same feeling.A warm comforting feeling that made her felt safe.His actions were hesitant,yet gentle.He fear he would break the girl before him like how he did to her boyfriend the same day he left her.He was afraid he will bath in that hate and anger.However relief swept him when he looked at her,he still knew he loved her.But he knew,they are already separated on different worlds.What his heart wants to say once more would not reach the girl.The world of darkness and world of light.He wished he could talk to her,let her recognize his voice.However,he fear he would be pushed away.By then,he would even be allowed to care for her.

The girl was slowly learning to understand being a blind is not so bad.She slowly learns how to be independent.However during the night,she will still cry alone with the boy looking at her with a sharp pain in his heart to see her suffering.The same scene repeated every night.Finally the boy could no longer take it.He walked to her side,placed his hand on her hand and whispered into her ear "you need not suffer any longer...".The girl was surprised that someone was close by and by the voice,she could not recognize it.Who could blame her,its been far too long since she heard it.She did not understand the meaning of those words.

Soon after,the girl recovered.Someone had donated his eyes to aid the girl.The girl opened her eyes and could see the world once more.The doctor presented to her a bouquet with a card that said "Do not suffer anymore in your life,smile for tomorrow that is to come".The girl smiled and thanked the doctor.However the doctor shook his head and said someone send it to her.The girl was puzzled but did not placed much thought to it.

She returned to school after a few days.Meeting her friends once more and live her life well again.All her companions including the boy's friend came to congratulate her for her recovery.When the boy's friend saw her eyes,they said with a sad voice "those eyes still carries the same sad glow,but this time with happiness underneath".At once,the girl remembered the boy who confess to her.She ask all of them whether they knew his location.They shook their heads with a sad smile.She returned home and asked her parents about the donater of the eyes.They replied "It belongs to a boy,he is a nice gentleman".The girl was stricken with fear,she quickly grabbed a mirror and look into it.She remembered these eyes from somewhere.During a night,she saw them.Those sad glow that emitted from them is very familiar.

She suddenly remembered the boy who had them.She grabbed her belonging and ran to the hospital,asking where the boy who donated his eyes is.The doctor could not reveal his location due to the policy of the hospital.The girl pleaded and begged.Finally the doctor gave in and replied "In your place..".The girl understood and went to the ward she once been in.From the door she peeked into the room.On the bed,the boy sat,facing the window.The girl fall to the ground,guilt-stricken and heart-broken.The boy is now suffering,in her place.Within her,she had already fallen in love with the one who given her the most care in her darkest moment.She walked to his side and called his name.The boy was surprised to hear her voice and asked that she leave immediately.He would not have her look at him in such a state.He called the nurse to send the girl out.She cried and plead to let her stay but the boy would not have her suffer by his side.

Every morning,the girl would go to the hospital and take care of the boy without saying a word.Like what the boy once did.The boy passed his day,now with a smile.Thinking the girl is living well now.While the girl too with a smile,is simply contented to take care of the boy and look at him each day.However,right now.They are two lovers,separated by different world darkness and light.Each knowing the other's heart,but can no longer reach one another.Star crossed lovers.
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Gimme your thoughts,and forgive me for the grammer etc etc,if someone will help me correct them would be good

Huh~

2009-07-05T06:26:00.003-07:00

Whew,i just reach home,went to bowling yesterday with cousins and my brother,been some time since i last saw them.slept at bro's house then..,morning 5am wake up and start to make my way home.When i reach,I CANT FREAKING FALL ASLEEP!!!,so in the end i dress up and went to my brother's house again,we went to fetch my aunt from the airport as she just return from guangzhou and then went to eat some thai food which is great,though i don't really dig thai food.
Let my end my post here,gotta catch a few shut-eye..

Time is the greatest curse of all
it always keep going on
never stopping
resulting the death of many,
however,with it
man learn to cherish what they have around them,
and they learn that they are not immortal
they would be gone one day
and that is a valuable lesson
a curse that brought about a gift

.:Wisdom:.
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WTF!!!

2009-07-03T07:45:00.000-07:00

today was a slacky day,went to school to find out classes are cancelled. WTH did i go for?,take temperature??.haha..

went to visit my grandmother,still as peppy and hip as ever. Heck..,she is even more updated of the world more then me i think.went home at 9+. I had a talk with my dad..,about my shitty math result. He started to ask me whether i am doing fine in school,and enforce me to not even try to work too..,okaaaaay.but overall,things went well.

Ending the post here,had to go somewhere later on,in this dead of the night...

Every man in this world have a price
name it right and you can get anything you want from him
which is why money makes the world go round.
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The shards littered on the floor reflected my life
broken and scattered
though each show me the pain and sorrow i went through
i felt nothing but bliss to take on such suffering
would i be allowed to continue do so or would i be stopped
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what the..

2009-07-02T05:03:00.000-07:00

Went to school as per normal,passed ENPS,but then not a good pass,found out i threw away 22 points because i never wtrite down my test box number,saw all ticks then 1 minus 22,haha..,ah well,must be careful.

went to the alumni clubhouse to eat,the food is not that bad,consumable,worth a try.nowadays i cant control my hunger,sigh..,i am becoming more and more glutton,however wait didnt,that is good,i would hate to grow fat,haha

sorry jovin jovan,i gotta bond with my classmates,i think i am neglecting them cos never see them for 1 month,haha.Sob~!,now i got no income too,not allowed to work anymore.Now that i think of it,my post are getting shorter and shorter ,cant help it,my days are boring.

when you look into the eyes of a beast
you can see the desire to hunt and the wildness in them
when you look in the eyes of a man
all you could see is the dull pupil in his eye
man have longed not be tested against perils
and now they have lost their instinct
when danger comes,they will fall
to die or survive lies in their palms
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Every tear that are shed contains a memory
when someone cry,are they trying to forget those memories?
which is why i told myself
i would no longer shed any more tears
in order to hold every dear memories to my side
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Tired le T_T

2009-07-01T07:21:00.001-07:00

just came back from jap class..freaking tired,reach home around10.30pm+.Things happen today,today was pretty normal except i was a bit shaken by what had happen during math class,hope everything is fine with Tao guang.I failed math btw,but basically its because of my careless mistakes as i could do all of the question when i tried it,i guess nervous during exam really cost me alot.This shows i am still weak to be be affected by such a small disturbance.

Jap class was pretty fun,scored full marks for the quiz,despite its last minute cramming.Went home with shi jie,lian shi and hang u on the same bus,took mrt with shi jie.Tired already,shall end here

Life is a game itself
fraught with fun and dangers
only difference is,there is no retries
cherish what opportunities you have
and you shall see the game's ending
whethers its a bad end or good end
its all shaped by your own hands
let no regret seeps into the crevice of your heart
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a short poem
无情

无情无情，真是无情
绝情非情，万事无情
无心无悔，无情无愧
做事无心，自然无悔
办事无情，自然无愧
终极情绪，绝是无情
感情之事，不动无情
既然无情，决不心碎
无情无情，办事随情

Sibei neutral

2009-06-30T06:36:00.000-07:00

Woke up this morning at 5 with a extremely diao feeling,i just feel like ending this day over and fast.bathed and hitched a ride to eunos then took 154 to school,saw sheryl and saran,at first i thought sheryl got more womanly,but i guess i thought wrong :P

slowly everyone came,exchanged the usual handshakes and greeting and hang out in the area for a while before going to class,I AM DAMN SURPRISED i didn fail eng mech,wahahaha,thats good.during EECAD,i slacked the whole way playing sims 3,could not stand how the teacher talked though..,haha,no hard feelings.I simply find it difficult to understand him.after that,still slacking my classes

after school went with Vin and Van to a 4e2 gathering,Cant say much,great to meet all of them,but ease off the shooting please,haha.almost ran without paying,damn,i thought i can make van pay for me,haha.

went home do project,actually decided to go pub,but dropped the idea and stayed home to play DOTA with jovin and others

Man was given the ability to feel
they experience joy and sorrow
both a curse and a gift
but does art thou enjoy having it or thou discard it

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Every gem in this world have its own sparkle
what it need is only a light to shine on it
people are the same,they only need the chance in order to start sparkling
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Wow,writing a blog again after so long,will take some time to get used to it

2009-06-29T04:45:00.001-07:00

Hi there,this is Ken's blog,Can't believe i started to write again after so long.

Nothing much happen today except I took my time to crack a few games wanted by people and slacked the whole day.I sure am getting a little lazy.Hah~!

I think its talking crap with jovin that suddenly made me wanna write a blog,i forgot what crap was said...,then later jovan and gang start to talk people up too.It was a LONG talk..,up till10.30pm+,hilarious at some point and stupid at the other. Thats all for today

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A short song part
永远

我愿对神，发誓永远爱你
我的唯一，请你把你全生放在我手里
说好地，你永都不离去
我对你，会拥有万年美好的恋情
所以你，可以安心地爱下去
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and another one which jovin gave me a slight idea

Brothers

We are brothers,till the end
we are like,two hands to clap
even if,it makes me sad
i would still,make you happy till the end

walk with me down the road,
until we can see the gold,
Never ever break away
and walk our separate ways~
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A little bit of humor too

Man A:"man,i am a great lecturer but a failure in practical"
Man B:"correction,you are a master of crap and a idiot at act"

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